Another adopting mama told us on our "Adopting from Haiti" facebook group that she was talking with a store cashier about the impending arrival of their little girl from Haiti. The cashier apparently then asked her if she was going to keep her once she had her home.
WOW.
I can not even fathom this question being asked of me by a complete stranger. Why on earth ANYONE would go through this process and NOT keep their child at the end is beyond me. It's so sad to realize this actually does happen on occasion for various reasons. It's also sad to realize some people actually ask questions like that without knowing any of the adoptive family's journey! However, I had to chuckle at the comment as well because it made me flash back to a conversation I had with Toby just a few weeks ago...
I was driving Toby, our 4 year old, back from
preschool the other day and he asked if Nora was going to be home by
Christmas. I told him that she wouldn't be, but that she'd definitely
be home for next Christmas. He then asked if that was before we would
be taking her back to Haiti. What!?!?! Very surprised at his question, I assured him that once Nora gets to
our house we will never have to take her back and she would be his
sister forever just like Lily is his sister (which I thought was a well-understood concept by this point). He looked confused and
said, "No, Mom, you have always said we would take her back to Haiti!" What!?!?!?! Very concerned with his thoughts, my mind was racing to try to figure out why
on earth he had been thinking she would have to go back. In my silence, he again adamantly expressed that I had kept
saying we would take her back. Finally it dawned on me...I HAD been
saying that all along! I had been saying when Nora was old enough to
remember the trip, we would take her back to Haiti with all of us along on the trip.
HA!!!! Poor boy...here he's thought my version of a family vacation to
take Nora back to Haiti to show her where she came from and have her
meet everyone again was his version of taking her back for good. Oh, so
sad--and funny too! I'm just glad we cleared up the story so he knows the truth. So he knows
when she gets here, she is here for good and that even after a trip to Haiti,
she would still be coming back home with us! Adoption through the eyes of a 4
year old--it's never boring!
In related news for this adoption to keep moving forward, will you please join us in prayer tomorrow, Wednesday, December 5th, as Nora's birth-mom, Adrienne, will go to the US Embassy for her interview? We are praying, obviously, for the interview to go smoothly...for the Embassy worker to be kind to Adrienne and for Adrienne to answer all of the questions well so we can move onward in the US side of our process with no delays. We also covet your prayers for the Haitian side of the adoption as well. We still haven't heard news about obtaining our adoption decree. We are hoping/praying for news this week that we received this also so we can move forward on the Haiti end of things. Movement forward, friends, that is what we are asking our Lord to grant us--movement forward so we can bring Nora home...forever!
that is a very weird question to ask someone, but unfortunately there are quite a few families who do not keep their adopted kids once they are here. i think it mostly happens with older children who have issues the adoptive families were not prepared for. so sad.
ReplyDelete