Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Beautiful, Bald and Bold

We Skyped with Maddie on Sunday and we knew from our conversation with her she was starting to lose her hair (although she looked super cute in her long pigtails and bandana while we were on with her). Then we got the message from Dan on their caring page last night explaining she was certainly now bald. I've been crying off and on the last several days at the thought of seeing my beautiful young niece getting weaker and losing her hair. It's something I don't like to face...don't want to face...can never really be prepared to face. It's hard enough for me to see anyone suffering the effects of the fight of cancer, but when it becomes your 8 year old niece in her second battle of this disease, there is an even greater sense of anger and sadness for what this disease, and the treatment for it, takes from a person.


Today, I emailed Amy & Dan and asked if they could send me a picture of Maddie. I wasn't sure why I felt so desperate to see her bald, but I did. Maybe because I just love her so much and wanted to finally face this reality. Somehow, for some reason, I knew I needed to see a picture of her. Once the picture came in, I figured out why God so desperately needed me to see it. This photo has changed my heart and attitude completely.

Instead of seeing a little child who is sick and becoming weaker, I saw before me a beautiful, bald, and bold young woman who is a fighter. Instead of seeing my precious Maddie, who I remember laying eyes on for the first time all wrapped in her blanket like a burrito in the middle of her crib at a few weeks old, seeming sad and defeated, I saw a Maddie with the look of "Cancer, you can't touch me. I am better than you." Instead of seeing what I dreaded, I saw what I aspire to be...a fighter for life...and not just life, but abundant life straight from the God of creation. Instead of seeing sadness, frustration, and anger, I saw joy amidst the pain, determination, and an "onward with life" look in Maddie's eyes.

Maddie is beautiful. Hair or no hair--cancer or no cancer. She is simply beautiful. Inside and out. Period.

Maddie is bald. That is the new reality to her life and even though we may see it first as a symbol of something she has lost unfairly in this life because of cancer, it is also a symbol of what she can beat in this life--the victory over this battle of cancer is hers for the taking...I truly believe that.

Maddie is bold. She has not once shied away from telling others, telling her parents, or telling her doctors that Jesus is behind the doctors and nurses healing her body from cancer. If she is willing to be that bold then why shouldn't we be with her?

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen." - I Peter 5:10-11

Thank You, God, for Maddie. Thank You for the picture I received today to lift my spirits and give me a refreshed sense of fight in this life. Thank You for Your love and care for Maddie and for Your desire to see her strong, firm, and steadfast. Thank You for Your healing power upon her.

1 comment:

  1. happened upon your blog and love it!! Maddie goes to the same church as me and my family and I have a daughter about her age. I love her head too!! No one could carry that off like Maddie. She is an amazing little spitfire!!!
    God Bless You, Auntie, hang in there. She will beat this nasty cancer. I believe that !!
    Janine Eitniear from RCC