I'm Still the Same "Angie" #1-Braiding Hair

I was sitting in choir class in 6th grade, bored.  Really bored.  So, I started playing with my hair.  For some reason I decided right then and there to take out my ponytail and figure out how to french braid my own hair.  I'm not real sure what it looked like in the back when I put a twisty on the bottom of it, but I remember feeling quite proud of myself at the end of class.

And that's pretty much how it started...a love of braiding hair.  My mom had been braiding my hair before this tender age of 11, but from then on pretty much, I took over.  As you can see in the photos above, I even decided to teach others how to braid hair by writing a paper on it for English class.  This was one of the treasures I found while searching through all of my old papers and scrapbooks.  I'm not sure what the fascination is with braiding, but I really do enjoy it.  Seeing strands of hair being developed into a beautiful pattern and tied off at the end feels like a nice accomplishment.

When Lily was born I was so excited to have a girl who had hair I could braid.  Her hair as a toddler was so thin and fine that braiding rarely worked, but I knew a day would come since Micah and my hair are both thick, thick, thick.  This is the first french braid I tried to put into her hair...it didn't stay for long because her hair was still so thin.

Over the years, however, it has thickened up just as I suspected, and now we can really have fun with her braids.

Little did I know at age 11, this learned trait in 6th grade choir class would one day be extremely beneficial...not completely for my daughter, Lily's hair, but for another little daughter I had no idea God would bless us with.

Nora's hair will undoubtedly give me plenty of times to perfect my love of braiding!  In fact, I'm a bit nervous about how much braiding I will have to do with her sweet little head.  4 hour braiding sessions will become a norm...I still can't even wrap my brain around sitting for 4 hours working on her hair.  I have been reading up on products, styles, how-to's, and don't- do's ever since we found our beautiful Haitian gem, but I still don't feel like I have a clue how to create those beautiful braids on her head.  Perhaps if I could actually get my hands on her beautiful black curls that would help. : )

Until then, I will continue to practice braiding on Lily, I guess.  She doesn't see to mind...

Who knew a love of braiding could become so valuable later in life!  Who knew my strange desire to have my hair corn-row braided as a high school student would actually be a precursor to a life-time of corn-row braids on my very own child.  Well, I guess I do know...God knew and He uses everything for good, doesn't He?!?

I'm Still the Same "Angie"

On one of my more recent trips back to my parent's house, I gathered several big "scrapbooks" of miscellaneous memories I put together from preschool-12th grade.  My task was to bring them home, go through them, pull out what wasn't needed anymore, and downsize it.  Well, little did I know I pretty much saved everything from preschool-12th grade, so this project has taken me a bit longer than expected.  The fact I have thoroughly enjoyed reading many of my papers, notes from teachers and friends alike, and found myself cracking up at some of the things I thought were important as a youngster doesn't help the time factor either.  It has been quite the trip down memory lane for sure!

One of the most interesting parts of reliving some of my past has been the realization that even though I have grown up, changed, and matured, there are still many parts of me who are still...well...the same "me" I was as a young girl.  Some of my giftings are the same, some of my insecurities are the same, some of my interests are the same, some of my fears are the same.  It has made me even more aware, as a mom, that my children are developing parts of who they will forever be before my very eyes--even as young as toddlers and early elementary beings.  Our "job" as parents is such a blessing.  Such a once in a lifetime opportunity to watch the personality of another human being develop before us in our every day lives.  It's amazing.

I've found certain parts of my discoveries so interesting, I plan on doing a little mini-series here.  I'm not sure if you will find it as interesting as I do, but my hope is that through these reflections, you too can see what we teach and instill in our children will potentially be with them for the rest of their lives...for better or worse.  I'll entitle each post in this series with "I'm Still the Same 'Angie'" with a further reference as to what "part" of Angie I'll be addressing.  Some of these posts will simply be amusing while others will hopefully show you what is critical to instill and what is critical to NOT instill in the future generations of youngsters who will grow up just as I did.  For starters, let me give you a few pictures to introduce you to the young girl whose eyes you are about to see life through...don't mind the quality of photos--they are pictures of pictures.  Oh, and don't mind the hair cuts--it was the 80's, friends!

Strong Enough...Continued Prayer for Maddie & Nora

Maddie and Nora.  They seem to go hand-in-hand in my thoughts and prayer life these days.  Well, and in these posts too, I suppose.  Here again, I post about both girls with the same prayer in mind for them and for our families...God, would You be strong enough for us all.

So many times in life I've heard the phrase "God won't give you anything you can't handle".  It's a nice phrase that helps you believe you will never be given anything in life that is just too hard.  Something that is not too hard to bear.  However, the problem with this feel-good phrase is that it's not Biblical.  No where in the Bible does it ever say God won't give you something you can't handle.  It's just a human phrase with human hopes behind it...it's not True.  Go ahead, try to find it, it's simply not there.

The fact is, many times in life we are faced with situations that ARE indeed too much for us.  Sickness strikes without warning, death comes, people lie, houses are destroyed, marriages are failed, children are rebellious, drinking claims lives, businesses fail, jobs are lost, and money is hard to come by.  I could go on and on with all the tough stuff in this life.  And if you are a person who has had the fortune of not being effected by any of the above situations then maybe your "tough stuff" is of the mental kind...your fears consume your ability to try something new, shame confines you to your loneliness, anger stirs your actions, abandonment makes you believe you are unlovable.  It's all too much to bear.  Too much to handle.

Thankfully, friends, Scripture does not leave us in our wallowing pit of despair.  It doesn't tell us we can handle whatever comes our way, but it does direct us to the answer in overcoming all of this evil and sadness.  It's a HUGE Truth found in a small little gem of a verse--Philippians 4:13.

" I can do all this through Him who gives me strength."

Did you read that?  It is NOT in our own strength that we get through these hard times, friends, but instead, Scripture calls on us to rely on HIM who gives us strength!   You see, God does allow us to go through situations that are WAY beyond what we can handle.  Way beyond what our own strength can withstand.  Situations where we will not have the answers, we will not have the know-how, we will not have the ability to get through it without one important tool...Him.  Without God coming along on our life journey with us, we will not make it through this life with flying colors.  We need to have God's own mighty power, authority, and strength especially in times when life is just too much to handle on our own.  We are too feeble.  Too weak.  Too human to handle everything that comes our way.  He is the only One who is big enough to handle any and every situation life throws at us.  It is only through Him we can do all things....and He is trustworthy to depend on.

So, with little Nora, I need God to get us through this next year or so until she comes into our home.  On days when it seems things will never end or I will never hear the words I long to hear from Haiti, I need God to gently remind me He is working everything out for Nora's good or I will go insane with the process.  I need God's strength to pick me up and carry me through another day of no word from Haiti.  I need God's authority and power to overcome the process itself and move paperwork safely and quickly through each step.  I NEED Him to be strong enough to overcome my weaknesses so I can make it through this adoption without losing heart.

And with Maddie, they are in dire need of His strength right now.  Maddie is, Amy is, Dan is, and even little Sydney is.  The test results have come back and her new white blood cell count has dropped to 1% now so they have officially said this bone marrow transplant has been unsuccessful.  This is extremely disheartening news for them all (and for us).  They are still waiting on some more test results to come back this week to figure out what the next steps will be.  Maddie's fevers and nauseousness has returned as well so they think she is still fighting the mono virus that seems to have wiped out her new white blood cells in the first place.  They have several options before them at this point...do another transplant right away with the one remaining cord blood donation, wait and do a transplant in a little while, don't do a transplant right now at all, etc.  They, and the doctors, need much wisdom as they weigh all the options and decipher what is the best plan of action for Maddie.  In the midst of wisdom, they also need a big ole dose of God's strength to get them through this because this setback is definitely beyond what they can handle...beyond what their own strength will get them through.  50 days in the hospital with an unsuccessful outcome is just too much.

I believe with all of my heart, however, that our stories do not end with loss and weakness when we give ourselves fully to the Lord.  In those moments, He swoops in, undetected perhaps,  and holds our arms up in battle until victory is won just as He did in the battles of the Old Testament.  He is a GOOD God, friends, even when life is hard.  I believe He intends for Nora to have a family to call her own.  I believe He intends on Maddie to have complete health and abundant life on this earth.  I believe He is still the Miracle-Maker, the Healer, the Daddy God who blesses His children.  It is that God I continue to pray to, plead to, and cry out to on behalf of both our adoption and our niece.  I will not stop believing He will come to our aid, our rescue, our defense.  I will not stop believing He will be strong enough for our journey when it really does get too much for us to handle.

Whenever I hear this song linked below, I think of Maddie, Amy & Dan.  I imagine their tired, weary souls trying to comprehend what may be ahead of them as they look towards more treatment.  In Dan's second post on their care page when this whole ordeal began, he shared, "All three of us cried and talked about how we are scared, sad, mad...and ready to fight! Amy and I are still incredibly stunned. Only the God of the universe will get us through this, because we aren't strong enough to do it without Him."  It is in the thick of things now, some 50 days later from that post, that we all need to remember these words and believe in the Truth behind them.

I also think of a story Dan posted just a few days into their time at the hospital.  He wrote, "I'll close with a conversation that I had with her (Maddie) this morning that really touched me. We were talking about a certain significant gift that someone had given to her and how she was going to receive it later today. While she was trying to guess what it was, I kind of made it sound like it was bigger/cooler than any other gift she had gotten before. To which, she replied, "Oh! Is it Jesus?!" And I said, "Ah, well, OK then, it is the second greatest gift that you could get." And then she said, "Because you know daddy, Jesus is all around this hospital, helping the nurses and doctors get my cancer gone."  Once again, despite my focus on things and details, my daughter manages to teach me about what matters most. May God be glorified in every detail of this journey...even as we hurt and wrestle with unanswered "why" questions."

I can't imagine how daunting it all must feel.  "In their moments of exhaustion, Lord, be the Strength they need You to be for them.  Jesus, be the Gift Maddie needs right now--the Gift of Complete Health.  Continue to do the work in that hospital to get Maddie's cancer gone forever and give her the gift of life on this earth to be that ever-ready testimony of the Strength You have given her.  Be strong enough for each of them, Lord, be strong enough to win this battle.  Lord, would You not only be the Strength Maddie needs, but please also be the Strength we ALL need You to be in whatever our situations are.  Thanks, God.  I know You can and desire to do this.  We trust in You.  Amen."

Maddie Needs Prayer For a "Welcomed Shock"

Well, friends, my heart aches to even type this...we desperately need prayers for our niece, Maddie, right now.  The positive is that she is physically feeling better right now and currently cancer free (yeah).  The negative is that her new white blood cells from the bone marrow transplant did a wonderful job at fighting her undetected subdued mono infection, but unfortunately are not thriving after being used in that battle.  They are not multiplying as they had been so her old white blood cells are regaining ground in her bone marrow.  Below you will find Dan & Amy's latest update from their carepage (found here).  Please read through it and PRAY HARD that her new white cells would start to miraculously multiply so she will not have to go through another bone marrow transplant again and remain cancer free.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for standing in the gap for our niece.  Team Maddie, let's get on our knees!
-----------------------------------

Day +36

Posted 4 hours ago

The last 24 hours are difficult to share and full of contrasts…highs and lows. I’ll start with some news we got this afternoon. Maddie’s test results from this week’s blood test are in and they show that only 5.7% of her bone marrow cells come from the cord blood donor and the rest are her old cells returning. This is a marked drop from last week’s numbers and it puts her right on the border of possible transplant failure. According to our doctors, studies have shown that when that number gets below 5%, there are is no chance of recovery and the process is considered to be officially unsuccessful.

Maddie is scheduled to have another bone marrow procedure done Friday morning, in order to discover a more definitive prognosis. The results from that won’t be in until early next week. If this transplant does not work, there is one last matching cord blood donor that Maddie can use for a second attempt at transplant. This means that Maddie would basically start the whole process over as soon as her body is ready again. The second cord blood matches Maddie slightly less than the first one did. The team is searching the international database to see if any new matches might be found, but nothing has surfaced so far.

In contrast to all of this dire news, the short term issues of Maddie’s health have been improving. Her fevers have been gone for a few days now. She has perked up and felt a lot better recently. Her white blood cell count has been climbing steadily, but this good progress could be coming from old cells inveterating. However, this temporary status has taken care of all known infection in her body for the time being. This allowed for a very important surprise yesterday afternoon. The doctor permitted a one-time 30 minute visit with Sydney in the room! They were not allowed to have much physical contact and they both wore masks, but the time together was magical. They laughed, talked, played and walked around the room together. The effect on Maddie was an infusion of joy and energy. Her sister blabbed on and on about it in the car afterwards, as well, saying, “I see Baddie!” As parents, our hearts experienced the bitter sweet taste of seeing them together for the first time in 40 days, but knowing that this ordeal is far from being over and we simply don’t know how it all will end.

It is a very difficult time right now, because the prospect of transplant failure means the inevitable return of cancer. Yet, at the same time, Maddie physically looks and feels the best that she has been since late May. We are trying our best to not give up hope, but in all honesty, an improved result next week would shock us…a welcome shock, but a shock nevertheless. We are also extremely grateful for the blessings of a sibling visit and less suffering for Maddie these past few days.
Needless to say, we covet your prayers for us.

From Joy to Jealousy--The Emotions of Adoption

I can't lie...this week I have been feeling a range of emotions about our adoption journey...peace, contentment, desperation, sadness, joy, and jealousy.  Top those off with an unneeded guilt and you have one mess of a person completely relying on her God to pull her through weeks like these.

It would be much easier to tell you I have it all together all the time, that I'm "fine", that I trust God with a smile on my face and peace in my heart at all times, but if I did that, I wouldn't be showing the true journey of adoption.  There are many, many moments I actually do feel these things genuinely, but that is only one side of the journey.  Those of us on the journey would be wise, I think, to tell the other side--to give everyone the true glimpse into the hard parts of the journey as well as the wonderful parts.  For anyone contemplating adoption, I would do you a disservice to allow you to think you will not go through the gauntlet of emotions along this road.  I hope and pray that if there is anyone out there contemplating this incredible call on your life, that this post will help you be prepared for not only the blessings of adoption, but also some of the heartache potentially waiting for you.  I'd rather you know about it now than have it slap you upside the head as if you saw nothing coming your way later on.  I'm not trying to be a "Debbie Downer" here, but I am trying to give you a glimpse at the reality of some days along this road--it's just not always easy.

You see, this week I have felt peace and contentment leaving Nora in the arms of a God who loves her and will care for her the best He can, which is far better than even I can do!  With the issues we had the following week with her birth father, I found myself in a furry of prayers for her safety.  I have had much more peace about this situation (probably fueled by the fact he has not been back since).  I know she continues to be safe at the orphanage and for that I am thankful, content, and peaceful.  I was so blessed to have gotten a few photos of her this week from a family who were there visiting their son.  It was always a beautiful thing to wake up to an email with this precious face staring at me...reassurance that Nora was safe and being cared for.  Ahh...peace.

On the other hand, I have also had the swing of emotion head towards the opposite direction.  I've felt almost desperate this week for word that we have moved along in our process.  The best way to describe it is feeling like I simply can't breathe.  Like I just won't be able to catch a good and proper amount of air in my lungs until I hear the words..."You have dispensation."  I know the reality, friends.  This dispensation step in the journey could take a very long time to receive.  I know my heartache to be done with this step is shared by others who have been waiting far, far, far longer than I.  I do not claim to be any more special or any more deserving of this step being done quicker than anyone else, and in fact, feel guilty praying for our papers to be signed immediately knowing there are so many others who have been waiting for the same thing for over a year.  (Guilt is not fun).  But, I still bring my prayers of desperation for our part of this journey to be over to my God because that is the desire of my heart and I know I am asked to bring those things to Him.  I know God can go beyond the realm of "process" and I'm praying whole-heartedly for that to happen...desperately praying for that at this point.

On top of this feeling of desperation, I've felt an incredible amount of sadness this week.  Sadness that adoption has to take this long.  Sadness that Nora will most likely live without our daily care and family life for another year even though we have the money ready to bring her home today.  Sadness that I just don't know how long it will be before I get to jump on a plane to Haiti and hold her again.  Sadness that I can't do anything tangible right now to speed this process up.  Yes, the process itself has made me quite sad this week.  The question I am probably most asked is, "WHY?!?!?  Why does it have to take so long???"  If I feel like it, I can go into the factual details of why it really does take this long, but this answer takes much longer than the person asking probably cares to listen too.  If I leave out the factual details and go to my heart of hearts instead, however, I can answer their question as fast as anything..."I don't know, but it makes me really sad."  I simply don't know why the process HAS to take this long.  It is by far the one thing that brings incredible sadness to my heart.  I break down in tears a lot when it's just me and God discussing all of this together.  Yesterday I was mowing and was surprised to find myself crying my way through a few passes of the yard as I simply told God my longings to keep moving forward in this process so I could go see Nora.  I wasn't necessarily planing on praying in that moment while mowing my back yard, wasn't planning on being brought to tears, wasn't planing on feeling so sad...it just happened.  There is sadness in the journey--no getting around it.

And then there is joy!  Yes, friends, you can actually feel both incredible sadness hand-in-hand with joy along this road.  I've felt joy this week reflecting on all God has blessed us with since we said yes to His plan of adoption.  Joy for the money people have given to help us make this decision a reality.  Joy for a gorgeous, big-eyed beauty of a baby girl on the other end of the crazy ride.  Joy for an increased faith and belief that God is working for my good.  Joy for the families I have been connected to who I never would have met if it weren't for this adoption.   Joy for watching other families have their numbers increased through their own adoption journeys.  Joy for the way Ive seen God highly at work thus far in the process.  Joy for my bio children as they embrace Nora as a sister through a computer screen.  There is much joy in the journey of adoption, friends.  Much joy.

And lastly, jealousy.  Yep, even jealousy works it's way into this journey.  Lately, I have to admit I've been jealous about so many of our friends' journeys of adoption.  So many of them within the last few weeks have had major steps forward while we have just been sitting motionless in our own.  I feel so much excitement for all of them and yet I can not lie--it is finely lined with a layer of jealousy I was ashamed or guilty for feeling.  I expressed these feelings of jealousy as well as the feelings of guilt for feeling that way to Micah.  I told him of my desire to separate my heartache from the genuine joy I have for the others' journeys because it just wasn't fair to my friends (who have pretty much all sat in my shoes along their own journeys).  I wanted to be able to be fully present in their moments of celebration, but felt like I couldn't do that very well right now because of how sad and desperate I was feeling about our own.  Lovingly, he helped me realize my jealousy is not a malicious jealousy birthed out of a desire to see myself superior to everyone else, but that it is simply a jealousy birthed out of a genuine longing for Nora to be in my arms just as their children are in their arms.  It is simply a Mama heart seeing in others what I, too, desire to experience with Nora.

So, yes, I'm feeling jealous.  Probably everyone along the road of adoption will feel it too at some point.  I wonder if the fact I'm feeling jealous is not as important as what I do with it.  Will I allow it to consume me and wallow in my stagnant state while 13 other children get one step closer to their moms and dads or will I admit it and allow it to fuel my love of Nora and my prayers to a God who can get her to me miraculously fast?  Will I allow it to stop me from celebrating with my blessed friends or will I say...

God, Zoe is absolutely beautiful!  I'm jealous that Nick and Marsha are getting through this process so incredibly faster than we are, but thank You, thank You, thank You for letting them love on her at home while she is so young.  Bless their first chance to experience what it is like to have a girl in the family.

God, thank you for this family of 4 siblings who will be raised by two incredible families in our very own church.  I am jealous they will grace the halls of our church sooner than Nora will, but will you use them to prepare the way for Nora to have friends who can empathize with her when she does come home.  Bless the Miller's and the Mounsithirajs as they just met their little angels and prepare to bring them home next month already!

God, thank you for Giselle (Nora's birth half-sister).  You know the journey her family has been on to get her so close to coming home!  I'm jealous Denise will get to be in Haiti so very soon to not only put her arms around Giselle, but carry her right onto an airplane in them instead.  I can't wait to do the same with Nora.  May watching this sweet family's homecoming journey help prepare me for that moment that WILL come to me too one day.

God, oh my heart, I love these children.  Gabe, Grace, Alex, Patrick, Stevenson, and Garry...they are like extended relatives...extended little cousins to Nora.  They are Nora's friends and family in Haiti and I'm jealous that all of their parents are traveling in the next week (or were just there or will be heading so very soon) to go before the Dean and move onward towards the second major part of the process.  Their trips are exactly where I want to be.  Will You please bless each and every one of their appointments with favor, ease, and quickness.  Will You fill each and every one of the children's hearts with love from all of their parents heading to love on them.  Will You please help our paperwork get signed by the President so very, very soon so we, too, can go show Nora the same amount of love these parents will be showing these beautiful kiddos during this time.

And finally, God, there is Nicholas.  Lord, bless his parents as they travel to meet Nicholas for the first time face-to-face.  There is no moment so precious in this journey (except seeing that face on the homefront, I'm sure).  I'm simply jealous they get to head to Haiti to spend time at the orphanage since it has been 7 months since we were there last.  Allow their time at ROH to be everything they need it to be and everything Nicholas needs it to be.  Bless this new union of parent and child in an incredible way.

Peace.  Sadness.  Joy.  Jealousy.  Guilt.  And every other emotion in between.  All a part of this profound adoption journey that, thankfully, God walks beside me with each and every step of the way.  There are days that are wonderful, there are days that are incredibly hard, but in the end every day is worth it.  This little face is worth it...

Will you please pray for my emotions during this adoption?  Pray not that I would never feel the harder emotions that I have been feeling recently, but instead, that I would be able to embrace each one as they come at me and throw them onward to Christ who can help me along the way.  Thanks, friends.

What A Year Can Do

July 4th means more than Independence Day for me...it means a significant step in our adoption process.  As I reflect back over the course of the past year, I am amazed at what all I have learned, what all has changed, and what all I am eagerly still looking forward to.

You see, last year on July 4th we took a little family outing to a neighboring garden called the Defries Calendar Garden.  This unique garden is shaped in a circle, divided into 4 different sections representing spring, summer, fall, and winter.  Each section houses many varieties of plants that come alive during those specific seasons.  Encircling the foliage is a brick path with dated stones...one for every day of the year.
 
During that time Micah and I had been having deep discussions on whether or not we would pursue adoption, what the right timing was, where we would adopt from, etc.  I was already fully on board with the idea and Micah was still processing a few things when we visited the garden.  As I walked around the garden looking at the dates on the bricks, I remember feeling a mixture of excitement and sadness.  Excitement because I just knew in my heart God was calling us to adopt, but sadness because Micah and I weren't quite on the same page yet and I didn't like feeling disconnected from my man.  As much as I wanted to jump into the adoption process (knowing it would be a long haul), I also wanted to have both Micah and I willing and ready together.  I didn't want to pursue something of my own desire without him also feeling called and at peace with the decision--especially something as big as adding another member to this Thieszen clan.  I remember wondering as I took pictures of our children by their birthday bricks, if I would have another daughter someday to bring to the garden for a picture and what brick I would get to sit her beside.

Little did I know that only 1 day later after the kids fell asleep, Micah would sit down with me, discuss some more details, and give us the green light to begin the process of adoption.  It was a moment where I thought my heart would burst into a million pieces.  Almost like the fireworks of the 4th of July--just in my heart! : )  It felt good and right and wonderful.  The following morning, July 6th, I sent off an email to the director at Rivers of Hope Orphanage letting her know we were going to begin collecting everything we would need for our dossier and to let us know when she had her next little girl needing a family.  I think I cried a lot that day--good, happy, excited tears of anticipation and a big ole' "YES!!!" to God. Our process began.

So now, one year later, July 4th, I sit amazed at what all this journey has done for me.  One year later, our children have grown up from this....

Toby 3 1/2, Lily 5, Quinn 1 1/2

 to this...

Quinn 2 1/2, Toby 4 1/2, Lily 6

One year later I do not have my daughter in my arms, but I do know I have another daughter...Nora Josephine.  We have seen her grow from this...

Nora-1 month old-October 2011

 to this...

Nora-9 months old (taken on July 4, 2012)

One year later I know the date of her birthday brick--September 30th--and I'm really looking forward to the day I get to take her out there for her very own photo shoot beside it.

One year later, just as all 4 of our children have grown, changed, and matured, I have found my heart has done the same.  I am completely grateful for the adoption journey God called us to participate in.  I feel as if this past year could not have been any better...well, maybe if Nora would have miraculously come home and Maddie's cancer would have never returned, but I think that is a given.  I will be grateful the following things (and so many others) have happened over the course of the past year...

• Meeting and spending a few days with our precious daughter in Haiti in December.
• Almost daily emails with two special women who are part of the ROH families.  Amy (whose blog is here) and Denise (whose blog is here) are an incredible source of support in the moments of complete desperation and despair as well as the incredible moments of celebration.  I feel as though we are sisters separated by miles.  Amy is adopting a sweet little chubs of a baby boy named Alex and an adorable little girl named Grace--they are heading to Haiti in a matter of days to go before the Dean.  Denise is adopting Nora's beautiful half-sister, Giselle, and should be heading down to Haiti any time to bring her little princess home to Canada.
• Having the chance to meet Nora's birth parents and thank them for allowing us to raise her in a loving, Christ-focused home environment.
• "Meeting" around 300 families adopting from Haiti through a facebook Haitian Adoptions group.  All with common hearts for adoption and for Haiti, they have been a blessing and a wealth of information to weed through!
• Walking alongside several other families in our own church currently working their way through their own adoptions.
• Watching God move in mighty ways by opening doors for things to move along in ways that can not be explained other than it being God.
• Having my prayer life bolstered ten-fold.  Wow.  I can not get over how much more passionate I am about praying.  If you want to deepen your prayer life to a new level,  get involved in something where you honestly can not do nothing but pray.  It works.
• "Meeting" several other families also adopting from Rivers of Hope Orphanage through an email group and then actually meeting 4 of these Mamas face-to-face where we could share our excitement, frustrations, and longings to have our children in our arms with each other.
• Seeing my children love their sister like crazy even when they have never met her and unfortunately still live an ocean apart from one another.
• Having my heart become even more compassionate for those in need--whether those needs are for food, shelter, a friend, formula, diapers, a mom & dad, or a Savior.
• Being privileged to share my heart for adoption with others who ask about our process in line at a grocery store or even during our fellowship time at church.
• Using my gifts as an artist to help raise funds to cover the costs of getting Nora home.
• Being blessed beyond words by so many friends, family, and strangers who have donated financially towards our adoption.  It's not every day I get to watch God lovingly draw others to a cause and collect a relatively huge sum of money in a matter of months to see it happen.  I'm so blessed.
• Believing deeper than I ever have before that our God is GOOD and loving and cares passionately for all of His children to have an abundantly good life to live in here on this earth.
• Buying bunk beds for the girls' room and saving Lily's outgrown clothes in the basement for another beautiful little lady to use in the future.

There really are so many things I could continue writing about.  It has been a full year of so many beautiful awakenings in my spirit...and most all of them simply because we said "yes" to adoption.

As this July 4th rolls through and we look ahead at another year in the adoption process, I find myself excited to see what all God will continue to show me.  A realistic statement would be to say this adoption process over the next year could not be kind to us and Nora could still be in Haiti next 4th of July.  However, I chose to place that realistic statement aside enough to acknowledge that God has so far proved to be bigger and better than the process and I don't anticipate His power to be changing.  I will go forward believing, as I always have, that He will get Nora home to us as soon as miraculously possible.  God could very EASILY have Nora home in my arms and taking a trip over to the Calendar Gardens for her photo shoot WAY BEFORE then.  That has so much more hope and appeal to it, doesn't it!

As our Lilypie ticker on the right-hand column of this blog continues counting on, I ask that you please continue to come alongside us on our journey and pray HARD with us for God's Good and Gracious Will to bring our little girl to our home.

Some Life Updates...

Seems there is so much going on in my brain right now that the best way to tell you things is to just do an update on various parts of life...

1) Nora

Some of you have asked if there is any update on Nora and if her birth father had come back for her again or not.  I have not said an update thus far because I hadn't had one to give.  I emailed the orphanage director 3 times this week with questions and just hadn't heard anything back.  It's been hard to not know what is going on, but also trusted that no news was good news.  Thankfully our friend, Whitney, got to head to the orphanage yesterday and confirmed for us Nora is still there and the birth father has not come back at all since our director had emailed us.  Praise God!  She also told us the wonderful news that Nora has cut her first bottom teeth--such a small thing in the grand scheme of things, but for a mom who hasn't gotten to see any of Nora's "firsts" this was so special for me to hear.  It's hard knowing I can't do a baby book for Nora because there are so many "normal" things every mom knows that I will never know about her.  The fact I can tell her that on her 9 month b-day, there was this picture taken of her and she had just gotten her two bottom front teeth in is amazing!  When she has her own children one day and wants to compare all these time frames to her own infancy and toddler years, I will be even more grateful for the way God has brought about people to help me know these things for her.  So, without further ado, here is a photo of our baby girl on her 9 month b-day...with two teeth!

 

Thank you, friends, for continuing to pray for Nora (for her protection and safety), for her birth parents as they are now separated (and seems from what I have heard that this is a good thing), and for our process to continue on as miraculous fast as possible.  I want more than anything to get her home soon, but we still have such a huge amount of the process to get through.  Continue to pray for the President of Haiti to sign off on our paperwork so we can keep moving forward.

2)  Maddie

Well, if I would have posted this one day earlier, I would have been able to tell you about the huge praises of Maddie's progress, but now one day later, I feel compelled to ask for your prayers for her instead.  There ARE praises...her white blood cell count has been going up and up and up!  This is huge!  She has been trudging right along with a smile on her face--even in the midst of weakness, fever, nausea, no appetite, cardboard tasting food, and no chance at leaving her hospital room for a whole month.  Her determination to beat this is inspiring.  Her counts had gone up high enough yesterday for the nurses and doctors to take their masks off around her and for her to get a walk (with her own mask on) down the hallway while it was a bit more quiet on the floor.  Huge progress!  However, today, we got an update that things have taken a turn in the wrong direction and they believe her fevers, nausea, and developing cough may be caused by an infection.  Please be praying for her body to be healed in Jesus' Name from this infection so her cell counts can continue to multiply.  They do not have any other confirmations on if this is an infection or what type it is yet, so lets just pray her body rebounds completely and that they will never find one.  She will have a CT scan done within the next day to try to find out more.  Please pray for this to be a minor blip in the radar and not a major hurdle to overcome.

3) Liam

Yes, Liam.  You haven't heard Liam's name on this blog yet, but friends, I'm SO beyond excited to introduce him to you.  Meet Liam Charles...our newest little nephew, born to Charlie and Rachel (Micah's youngest sister) in Topeka, Kansas this past Friday.  Liam was born almost a month early, but I don't think his parents minded much since they have been waiting for him to appear a lot longer than many other parents.  Charlie and Rachel have endured the heartache and long process of fertility issues.  They have been to hell and back again with an IVF that resulted in their very first pregnancy, only to lose the baby early on.  I will never be able to fully understand the heartache they have had to go through as a couple.  They have never given up on their dream and have fought hard for their chance to be called "Mom & Dad".  It is with much joy, many prayers, and tears of thankfulness that we welcome this little miracle man into our family.  Liam, you are worth every ounce of love your parents have put forth to have you join our family and we commit to love you the very best we can.  Charlie & Rach, congrats again and I simply want you to know I have the utmost respect for the strength, commitment, and love you have for each other and for Liam.  Friends, can you even stand how incredibly cute this little guy is already???

I hope and pray all is well with each of your lives and that we can all start this next week off knowing God loves us more than we can even imagine and He is working for the GOOD for each and every one of us.  Praise God!